totally disappointed. hopes too high and that's what you get. i thought you changed so much already. wanting me to come your house to be with you. but what do i see? you go do your hair extension without even telling me while i'm on the phone with you. it is so hard to tell the one you love what you doing? dont try to tell me its a pleasant surprise. sigh. and what else do i see? you deleting your logs again when i told you to keep it? why must one keep deleting logs if one got nothing to hide? isnt it too obvious? when you're at home alone you kept logs, but when you know i'm coming, you just quickly delete it. isnt it suspicious?? shit man. how long can this go on? just as i thought everything will take a better turn, we still end up like that. you're still doing the same old thing.

i gave you attitude cos of all this. and what is it? you're giving attitude back to me. great. later on i'll hafta apologised for everything. you just took your hp out. you see what i mean? FUCK. why must you keep hiding things from me?

everytime you delete your logs , its just like telling me, "YEAH JUSTIN CONTACTED ME!" FUCK THAT OK. i'm so pissed off right now i dont know what to do. i'm just so sick and tired of all these.

maybe my friend is right. i'm under slight depression? yeah i think what i'm feeling right now, it's depressed. so damn right. i hate my life right now. i hate the things you do to cover your tracks, i hate the things you do without even telling me and doing it behind my back. i really feel like dying soon.

Yi Ri Bu Zhong, Bai Ri Bu Ren.

thanks. i'll take it to heart. one day i'll just break down, cry like fuck and let everything go? i'm not sure about the last one though. shit. someone save me.

* my S H A T T E R E D dreams_ 1:15 PM