man. something happened on the 10th of nov. i don't even wana think bout it. i didn't know what really happened. she claimed to have forgotten it. well baby, let me tell you this, no one ever hurt me like that before. i've got a taste of it and i didn't know how to handle it. i blew up. any guys would. it really hurts to the deepest spot in my heart cos i really love you alot. i don't know how am i suppose to forget it. cos i don't know what really happened. u promised me never will there be a second time. i sincerely hope that it's true. this past a month plus or so, seems like i've wasted my time and love. but i'm glad you start to change. start to make us have a better life. all your promises, i hope you will not break it. not a single one of them. i love u.

alright. let's just forget about that. i really can see you changing. and that i'm feeling abit loved by you. i mean you do love me alot too right? i just wana spend a long time, happy and loving, with you only. i wana hack someone to death, it's you who stopped me. it's you who's stopping me from doing anything. i haven't seen you for like the 3rd day running. and i'm missing you like crazy. i hope there's a chance to see you later? i'm lovesick. pearlyn-sick. pearlyn-crazy. i just need you right here right now. when i hug you, i feel the assurance. i feel that you really love me. mayb it's just naive thinking. i don't know. but when i do hug you, i always hug you tight. i've learnt how to appreciate someone when they are around. i swear you'll have a good life with me. i'm gonna do that or die trying.

right now i'm at the mess since like 8 days? updating all those shit could cost me ALOT of time. so i just wana say what i feel now. that's it babe.


never ever hurt me again, i can't take it. i really feel like dying. in my heart, there's only you. i trust you. but don't betray it. i need you in my life. i really do cos i'm loving you so deeply. trust me, i've never felt like this.

* my S H A T T E R E D dreams_ 6:59 AM